Since I could remember I couldn't wait to turn 23. That was the deadline, matter fact according to my book I should be married at the age of 23. Now that the deadline is approaching, I don't even want to think about marriage.

Watching my sisters fall in love and get married and move out is making me  paranoid to leave the life I have known and the people  that meant everything to me behind and  follow a "guy" I met yesterday. BUT That's how this family that I can't let go started.   mother met father and left to live with him and start a family, and that is what my sisters are doing, starting a family.

Other than leaving you family, I discovered that "freedom" goes away. I mean I wake up and think about me, I don't cook for anyone but me , I don't clean for anyone, and I don't try to please anyone but the one that created me. I guess you can call me spoiled child.

I visited my sister who recently  got married. May Allah bless their home. Both god fearing people. He goes to work sets up a beautiful house for her. And she takes care of the house and cooks. You would think DAH, that  is how it works. My sister is cleaning freak, even when she was at home she use to clean and cooks for us . But sometime she didn't cook or clean. They day's she didn't feel like lifting a finger was okay because  there were other girls at home who would do that. But now it's all on her. You know I actually convinced my self that after marriage things go easy, its your home you do it when you feel like it. That's what you think. I actually hard.